supp paper was bad.

okay. so the ob supp was today and it was bad. ):

gahh. its so annoying cos i could do the questions in the main paper and not this. and really, i don`t think i failed the main paper cos i checked the answers and stuff.

so it means that i shouldn`t even have gone for the main paper laa. cos if my coursework failed, no matter what also have to take supps. and it would have been better to just take supps anyway cos now i`m just so upset that i could do the main one but not this.

all the chapters that i don`t know/blank in my book came out. grrr. stress, conflict, variable all. damn shit laa. i think i may have to retake next sem. which would suck big time. ugh.

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anyways, i bought shoes! ((: $10 patent black heels! whee! although i don`t really know how to wear heels yet laa. :D

and oh, when i was waiting for the train at tampines i saw something. =/

okay, the drawing`s not very good and it looks silly. but is there something wrong?

yes ma'am. thank you. i can see your pubes.

OMG. i don`t know how this woman wears her clothes laa! it didn`t look like her pants were worn too low or what lehh. maybe she never wear panties or what. =/ seriously! it was so shocking i think i stared. HAHAHA! no laa. i was just damn shocked. and grossed out. eee.

and yaa, that is the main reason why i`m blogging. haha! =X

and oh! i saw a cute guy on the train. heh. :D but he`s from acs international and looked cocky. bahh. and i think i can confirm now that i find guys with nice/sharp noses attractive. heh.

okay, gonna eat dinner. bye.

ob tmr.

when it comes to a stage where she doesn`t even bother.
when nothing seems to be of any importance.
when each day passes with no purpose.
when she just go through the motions everyday.
when she doesn`t even worry cos she doesn`t care.

that`s when i need you most.
everything`s just ____.
i`m really dreading april 23rd when school starts.
it was damn hard going through one sem.
i don`t think i can get through another one.

help.

ob tmr and i should be studying. but am i?

help

i need help in ob so that i will confirm pass my supps.

cos i definitely do not want to retake the whole subject again. poot.

and then, i also need a job. but i can`t look for one now cos i have no idea when my supps will be, ie when i`m able to start working.

ding, you have to start studying now. really. you cannot afford to retake it. it`ll kill you. D:

then, go find a bloody job job cos your ang pao money`s almost all gone and you`re broke. = cannot afford to slack for another month intead of earning money.

okay go.

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happy pics. (:dearest raisa. (: oldest of the bunch. haha! :D

snapshot. sneaky huhh. *grins


awww. love. ((:


toilet heh. reflections. again and again till forever. (:

yay another meet up soon pls. :D

shit.

ahh damn. results were out this morning.

i failed OB. gahh.

hello supp papers. hello again gpa score from yr 1. ):

and my day went downhill from there.

big fight.
tempers.
shouts.
retorts.
sacarsm.
tears.
walk out.

i don`t know where he is now.

Jesus help. i know you love me.

date with DAZ!

ahhh! :D so happy, so happy.

so yeah, i had my date with my most lovely daz and yay!! :D

i met up with jul at yewtee and was 15 mins late. oops. =X heh. then we went to meet raisa at bugis. ob the way she told me about why she has ah lian hair now. haha! ((: okay okay, not ah lian hair laaaaaa. poot. *grins.

talked non stop the whole way there and when we reached, raisa wasn`t there yet. so does this mean that she was later in meeting us than i was late in meeting jul? :D whee! (:

anyways, we just talked non stop seriously. all the way while we were shopping, to lunch at ljs, to our trip to the 2 storey this fashion, to our adventure into the fitting room (teehee!), to walking over to shaw towers(?) in a slight drizzle to meet hui. ((:

had dinner at Roma`s Deli or vice versa, not sure heh., which is hui`s workplace, and interrogated hui over her new guy. :D *evil smile. but didn`t manage to squeeze much info out anyway. heh. had a surprise celebration for raisa`s 19th birthday, (old alr! heee!) and the owner`s of the shop were so nice that they switched off the main lights for us, leaving only the spotlights. :D so nice!

from there we left and went to suntec and then to marina`s hong kong cafe where we sat there, chit chatted for quite very long and laughed quite loud. :D and all we ordered were 3 teh xis. haha! whatttt. we were very full after dinner k. ((:

and then it was off to esplanade to nuah where we questioned hui somemore, *grins, and discussed the art of holding hands! with me and jul demonstrating. hee! :D

i had a really wonderful time and really, next time when i grow up and have kids, these will be the darlings that i`ll say are my oldest friends. :D

i just love it that we can not see each other for like, maybe a year and still talk non-stop, full speed like we were still in sec school. *bigsmile.

and to me, this is real love, real friendship. where we`ve known each other so well that we are so comfortable being our real selves with one another, knowing that they will accept me for who i am and all that i`ve been through, and telling me straight when i`m wrong, just cos they love me. ((:

dearies, i really love you all so very very much. ((:

love, ding. -muahh. :D

ps. hui didn`t realise that i changed my blog and has been faithfully been visiting my old blog for close to year to check if i updated. OMG haha! funniest joke of the day! we laughed so loud! :D and to think we though sasa was the slowest. new record! :D hahaha! hui, you know i still love you many many. ((: teehee!

pictures when hui and sasa have uploaded so i can steal them. :D

date tmr.

on a happier note, i`m eating Julie's Butter Crackers and its very yummy. (:

and, i`m having a date tmr with my beloved daz! ((:

yay! can`t wait! :D

okay, since i`m feeling better i can go to sleep now. cos its alr 3am. heh.

hmm. maybe i`ll go have some chocolate first. hee!

i won`t get fat but will instead slim down, amen!

so angry.

rarr. i am so damn angry. D:<

i absolutely cannot take it when my brother is so damn rude to me. ARGH!

i won`t say that i`m a very good sister or what, but seriously, i don`t expect to take that kind of shit from him k. wth la.

my relationship with my brother can be compared to that of an abusive boyfriend i think. like, you know that he`s gonna give you shit soon but you just love him and be nice to him, knowing clearly that he`s gonna slap you in the face soon. knowing that you treasure this more than he does. rarr.

i know it sounds damn weird but that`s how i feel. like i`m nice to him and giving in to him/them just cos i know that if i do anything about it he`ll blow up and start spouting shit that oozes with sacarsm. damn it la. i`m older than you where the hell are your manners pls?

and not that i wanna be damn calculating of what k, but come on. i`ve defended from the parents how many times. even when you throw your temper at them i still say that you have a point in the argument even if it does get me on their bad side. but what do you do? you give the same shit back to me!

you think you own the whole world or something man. like your stupid mapling is so damn more important than whatever i have to do. fine, even if i`m not doing anything productive online, its my computer. so stfu. i really get damn pissed when you just come over and say "wahh jie, shopping again?" or "what are you doing? so weird/boring/etc." and you just sit down and look at me use the net, clearly giving out vibes that you wanna use the com. gahh.

and the worst part is, this isn`t a abusive boyfriend relationship. i can`t just up and walk away from you/this. that`s why its been happening again and again and its getting so bad that no one actually dares to stand up to you and reprimand you in fear of your horrible dreadful anger.

and because this isn`t an abusive boyfriend relationship but a flesh and blood sibling/family one, i do still love you. just that you`re shit to live with seriously. and i can`t take it anymore.

i`m not gonna let you step all over me. i`ve had enough. if you don`t wanna treat me with respect or as a sister, neither will i.

let the cold wars begin. i don`t really care anymore.

sad.

i can`t even explain how i feel.

disgust, yes. but there`s like a hundred emotions more.

its like, my brain is frantically working and zooming in and out to make sense of all of this. but it just cannot! my brain is frazzled and confused. okay, not so much much confused but uncomprehending.

why? how?

seriously, wth?

its damn strange to not know what to think, feel or do.

but one thing is that i feel sorrow.

sorrow for the lost of feelings, trust, everything.

i`m sorry all this happened to you. if it helps at all, i trust you. and i believe you.

geez, i really don`t know what goes through people's heads.

gracegrace. Daddy, lift you above this. pls.

movies to watch.

oh!

and now i have many movies under my watch-list.

Dreamgirls
The Number 23
I`m a Cyborg But That's OK
Freedom Writers
Half Nelson
Volver
The History Boys
13 Tzameti

The Lives of Others - at The Picturehouse

gahh. so many things to watch but so little money! rarr.

and also, Disturbia which probably won`t be opening so soon since it only opens in US on April. heh.

and i missed watching Children of Men and Perfume: The Story of a Murderer. gahhh. and i`m not sure if Singapore had/is going to have La Science des rêves. so upsetting.

too many shows man. i cleared my last list of movies to watch and now i have a whole new list. poot.

movies with shep.

k, i watched The Pursuit of Happyness

and Paris, je t'aime


yesterday with shep.

shep was very sweet today. he paid for my drink and did not get angry with me when i was very late. he is the epitome of my dream guy.

HAH! blahh. that whole paragraph was what shep wanted me to say. only that.. its all lies. oh, the horror! haha! and i kinda forgot the part about the dream guy. i don`t think he said anything about epitome. hmm, nvm. its all nonsense anyway. :D

but what i did want to blog about today is that shep is quite similar to inez. they make funny speech blunders! teehee!

anyways, shep was describing his legs or something and said volumitious instead of voluptuous. haha, it made me wonder if it was a word that i hadn`t learnt yet or what. especially when he said it more than once. hah!

but anyways, both movies were really good. (: pursuit of happyness was really heartwarming without being totally hollywood-ised. it seemed like a real account of Chris Gardner's life. (although in actual fact, it wasn`t that bad.)

but i want the dvd/vcd of Paris je t'aime. (: really really. i need to watch it again. and again in another years and maybe five years after that. (: it feels like that kind of movie for me.

"Thomas Listen. Listen. There are times when life calls out for a change. A transition. Like the seasons. Our spring was wonderful, but summer is over now and we missed out on autumn. And now all of a sudden, it's cold, so cold that everything is freezing over. Our love fell asleep, and the snow took it by surprise. But if you fall asleep in the snow, you don't feel death coming. Take care."
:D i love.

date with sasa.

had a great date with raisa! (:

played in spotlight - gypsy lady. white bunny. leprechaun. beach babe. phantom? haha! - and got a little 'hot' souvenir as well. teehee! (:

went shopping at carrefour and snuck a box of bread and 2 bottles of yoghurt drink into the cinema by stuffing them into my bag which was definitely not big enough. :D

watched Protege

and agreed that Daniel Wu is quite hot. ((:



went shopping and tried clothes! yay! but realised that i am very much shorter than raisa so the clothes looked very very different on both of us. boo. yes i know i`m not very tall. ):

sasa got this green dress that looked totally awesome on her but looked like a sack on me when i tried it first. haha! now i`ll have to be on a look out for a cute dress so we can wear our dresses together when we go out. :D

ohya, met ryan and went taka and fareast. had shilin chicken and mushroom cheese crepe at longjohn's for dinner. (:

wanted to get pretty cheap shoes for sasa but no size. gah. looked for the cd shop for quite long and by that time everything was closed. haha. (:

went home together on 190. (:

had a marvellous time spent in her company, talking non-stop about anything and everything. :D

next date: next monday - bugis village :D :D

so excited! lovelove!

and oh, got an sms from someone asking why i mentioned this outing but not the other one. haha. okayy. outing with shep on wednesday to watch Pursuit of Happyness. (: and maybe Letters from Iwo Jima and Dreamgirls. maybe only laa. gah. no moolah. poot.

can`t sleep.

gah.

i hate getting/being/feeling sick.

especially when i don`t know what the hell it is. then i won`t know what medicine to take. then i won`t take any at all cos i`m too lazy and i`ll tell myself that its better not to kill myself taking the wrong meds. then i`ll get even sicker. and i hate it.

another thing. i think it messed up my brain or something cos i went to bed at 11+ and woke up at 4+ and haven`t been able to sleep since. its 8+ now. and i did try to go back to sleep for about 2 hrs.

this sucks.

on a happy note, i have a movie date with raisa later on! (: wheee! protege finally!!

i`m so happy i finally found someone to watch it with me since most people i know don`t watch chinese shows. i don`t either but this show just looks very good.

the only person who wanted to watch it as well was my brother and we did make a date. BUT, its nc16 and he`s only 15. boo. and the worst part is, my goddang brother eventually watched it with his friends!

RARR!

he said it easier to sneak in when he`s watching with 8 people compared to just me. gah. i know it makes sense, but still.

so yes, i am very glad that i will be watching it later. (: with lovely raisa no less. ((:

hopefully i will have enough energy for the whole day. and that i don`t fall asleep during the show!

maybe i should take a nap. heh.

kk i`ll go try.